I may have mentioned at some point that last summer, I interned at Bank Negara. Well, earlier today, I stepped foot back there for the first time in almost exactly year. It was strange… and jarringly so. As I walked onto the premises, I felt an odd form of nostalgia. I feel like I’ve left it long enough to feel like an outsider, but not long enough such that I still knew my way around and still recognized the brick pavements and glass walls. Instantly, I could remember the Hilary Duff album which was my ultimate guilty pleasure last summer. As I stepped into the elevator, I almost laughed when I vividly remembered the time Syed got so star struck because we were in the same lift as Redza Minhat. Walking past the lobby, I remembered sitting on those black couches waiting for Aunty Aslaini to be done with work so I could go home with her.
I absolutely did not expect to feel that way at all. I think it’s just so funny how places can make you feel things like that, don’t you? I bet you do—I bet you’re laughing at how sentimental I am being about a building. I’m laughing about it too. But then again, if you knew me you shouldn’t be all too surprised because I tend to be a very nostalgic person, and I always feel overwhelmed when I visit a place I used to go to all the time but haven’t been to in a long time.
For example, I wrote this last year when I was at the Kelana Jaya station (because I used to take the LRT from Kelana Jaya to KLCC all the time while I was working at Petrosains for a few months after I was done with my A Levels).
I know this is supposed to be a “happy” post so here’s what makes me happy about all of this. I, as a person who lives in a default state of bursting-at-the-seams-with-emotion, regard that fact as a kind of burden more often than not because I hurt a lot, I worry incessantly, I get sad more intensely and for longer periods of times, I pick at my feelings like they are food and I am a child without an appetite. But my god do feeling things make me feel so alive sometimes. They make me feel so unhardened, so real, so human. And yeah it’s kinda funny that I feel things about buildings and train stations, and it’s sad when I brew over heartbreak longer than I should… but it just means I also feel such strong feelings about people and issues and ambition and that’s okay. I kinda like it that way.
I arrived in Singapore and was reunited with one of my favourite people in the whole wide world, Hui Jie! You might remember her from literally all of my blog posts throughout the past two semesters. (For example: when she let me sleep in her bed because my room had a rat, when she teman-ed me at the hospital and being my loyal gym buddy) I decided to visit her because she won’t be around next semester; she’ll be studying abroad in Copenhagen which is super exciting but I’ll miss her so so much. She told me she bought Twisties and Coke for me (because that was our weekend staple back at Penn) and I was so touched. 🙂 She’s really the sweetest.
The three of us got dinner with Ken and Jamie on Saturday and I think the most I laughed the entire trip was when I freaked out thinking Ken had a massive scar on his arm and then realised it was just a stain of kicap, hahaha. Here is an insanely low quality screenshot of Jamie’s snapchat video of that incident:
I just really love spending time with these two. ❤
I’m sorry this is late, but I wanted to be a little off the grid this weekend. I know no one really cares but this whole 100 Happy Days thing is more of a matter of integrity to me, so I care, so I apologise.